Saturday, February 14, 2009

Just thinking

Well, here I sit on Valentines Day looking at old post and remembering, remembering things that I thought I did not remember or feel.

The first 33 days at Children's was a bit of a whirlwind but reflecting back on the blog and videos this evening has brought back a lot of dark days. Seeing pictures of Elizabeth, ones we have shared with you and ones we have not, has been a bit sobering. I too can go through a day and think she is ok and then one moment back in time reminds me of the battle that still lies ahead.

One thing I can say for sure is that I have grown immensely in my faith. I look at the pictures and feel the despair that I felt four months ago, even though I had faith. Seemingly so to me, one of little faith. It is something that I can not even begin to describe or make you feel....I guess like what Elizabeth must feel like sometimes when she thinks of her mortality. No one can understand unless you have been there, we try because we love and care for each other but still can't get it.

I watch Elizabeth, Randy, Catherine, and James go through their emotions, each one different from the other, but non less or more and wonder how they cope; just like you probably wonder how I/we cope. I do know this more today than I ever have and I understand it too; it is only by the grace of God that I/we get through this. It is because of the strength we receive from him through your prayers that we can and will survive this journey. We will be stronger and will not be lead by our fears. God did not promise to shelter us from lifes difficuties but He does promise to be with us every step of the way.
As we get ready to head into the next phase we continue to ask for your prayers for Elizabeth and our family. God knows what is ahead for us and he is already prepared the way by bringing all of you into our lives. I thank you for you friendship, love, and support, of our family.

May God show you the love he has for you and continue to bless each and everyone of you.

Blessings,
Christine

6 comments:

Marianne Rosendale said...

Christine & Randy:
This is Marianne & Paul Rosendale. I just wanted you to know that we think about you everyday. My daughters visit the blog often and we all pray for you and Randy and your famiy. Liz and your family are on prayer list all over Springboro. Your faith just blows me away. I just wanted you to know we are praying for you.

Love,
The Rosendale's

Melissa Grablovic (Lohman) said...

Thanks for this post! Even though I haven't been around in a couple of weeks, I'm still checking the blog and praying every day. See you this week hopefully! Keep it up!

G

cath said...

Christine,
You know I don't know you well but appreciate your transparency. To be four months into this trial and be grateful for your increased faith in God. God is using Liz and your entire family to bring Him glory. I am guessing many other people's faith is growing as a result. I continue to pray for your family. I am a Sycamore grad as well and it is really fun to see a community come together to help one another. In much prayer.
Cathy Huffer

Robin O'Neal said...

Christine~
My mama's heart is so with you. Your experience, trials, and heartfelt words bring tears to my eyes. It was so great to see all of you in church this morning.
Prayers and blessings for a week of miracles,
~Robin

Christina Schnitzler said...

What an inspiring testimony. Christine- you are amazing. God is so amazing and he has an incredible plan for the Lothrop family, i just know it. Keep up the faith, God will give you the desires of your heart. :) Much Love and Prayers. I think and pray for you guys allllll day long.<3

Aunt Patti said...

Christina Louise,
What you posted was beautifully put. As your little sister, I look up and admire you. You are the type of role model that I hope I can be to Blake as well as others. Being a new parent is scary and overwhelming.It amazes me that the love I feel for Blake is so powerful. To think that he will go through lifes up and downs and that I can't protect him frightens me. I can't imagine the strength of faith you have. I only hope that God grants your prayers. Lizzie will fight this and be a stronger young women because of this adversity!
Love your little Sis